People who collect exes and who in fact collect ‘supply’ are what I’ve joked are ‘haremologists’.
If a person collects attention but is pretty indiscriminate about it and doesn’t have a harem per se (like people who trawl for attention on introduction ‘dating’ sites, Facebook et al), they’re more of an attentionphile.
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In fact, I’ve heard a lot of versions of this story where they claim that they’d assumed that they were kindred spirits who were coming from the same emotional place and leaning on each other for friendship and support. The sad thing is that once you realise that you are in a harem, even if you’re peeved at being messed around, your own ego then worries about not being in the harem and even that he/she might choose another member.
You might find yourself hanging around for reputation management.
They’re also deterrents that tend to keep potential new partners at bay or are disruptive if it progresses.
Even the most secure people in the world would feel rattled by going out with someone who spends most of their time juggling their exes including ex love interests.
I had to remind her that she is pretty damn great too.